LILLIES IN A FEVER DREAM

I can’t recall

whether it was I or they who spoke,

but I recall burying the feeling

under cigarette smoke.

It was both too much too soon

and too little too late.

They felt the pressure in my lungs

and wilted in the presence

of my reprobate tongue.

My voice became essence,

dust luminescent,

and it choked me.

I convulsed and erupted,

took on unnatural forms.

I can’t recall which

I settled upon.

I can’t recall

I can’t recall

Had I tripped or had I been pushed?

I was falling deeper into the grove and bush.

It was coming to an end.

The lilies became stars in the night sky,

convulsing, erupting, nebulae.

I stared into them, fixated.

I can’t recall why I didn’t die.